Pokemon could be soooooo much better!

Welp, we’re back! It’s been a while, and I’m glad to see the site back up and running. Despite the fact that my profile is still not on the site, the passwords are the same-so I guess they haven’t confiscated the keys to my cubicle just yet.

Probably best to end that rant before it begins, so, without further ado, to the actual subject of the post!

I work hard.

I’m not trying to brag or anything. I’m just proud of the work I do. Much like that of a five dollar stripper, or Thomas Jefferson’s black mistress. And because of that work, I was able to buy a nintendo 3DS. An XL, to be exact, because there is always room to compensate. I wasn’t making any grand illusions to myself- I was getting it mainly to play Pokemon.

And I have.

I have spent so much of my time playing Pokemon x and I have been really enjoying it. But, ever since I started out in the first pokemon town and battled my way through eight gym leaders to the Elite Four, I’ve been stuck with this nagging thought in my head.

Pokemon could be so much better!

Let’s face it, the relatively cut and paste storyline of pokemon is getting old. You are a trainer, you have a rival (although you cannot name her in Pokemon X….what a disappointment. I really wanted the extra laugh that would come with the sentence “You defeated Saggy Naggy”), and there is some sort of evil team that wants to be giant dicks for some really stupid reason. You beat them and the continue on your journey until you beat the elite four and become a pokemon master.

Don’t get me wrong, it still works. Pokemon games are some of the best selling of all time and the ability to customize your team and battle your friends is one of the best moves a game could do. What i’m focusing on here is the plot. It’s well overdue for a change.

Consider this example:

What if, instead of trying to make the world more beautiful or something gay like that, the organization (say Team Unity for this example) is rallying against the abuses trainers commit against pokemon. The battling thing is kind of crazy when you think about it. You force pokemon, who become friends with you by forcing them into a ball, to battle each other until one of them passes out (we assume they pass out, they could very easily die).

An organization like that would bring a very different balance to the game- they are still pretentious assholes, but they actually have a point. Now every trainer is questioning their actions, and not just trainers, gym leaders too! Suddenly, gym leaders are joining the cause and arguing for a change! Through your actions, you can either convince them of the truth, that pokemon actually love fighting to the death- they’re just crazy about it, or that they are indeed right to rally against the system.

Throw a little bit of choice into an already baby RPG.

Just think of how much better Pokemon could be! I’m not saying it has to be this exactly, but for the love of God do something different! If I have to replay another pokemon game with the same story, I’m probably going to strangle someone!

-Jim (who still knows all the passwords)

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Posted on May 11, 2014, in Gaming, Posts and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. If I’m remembering correctly, I think Team Plasma in Gen V was sort of like that – their goal was to liberate Pokemon from captivity/trainers. They were like the PETA of Pokemon.

    I agree though, the formula is repetitive, but it’s solid. In any case, I honestly don’t play Pokemon for the story anymore anyway, haha.

  2. Ummm….if you want a different story, I guess you could check out the fan games like Zeta, Omicron and the like.

    In all seriousness though, I really don’t think that the basic formula of battling->gym leaders->elite four->champion is gonna’ change ‘cuz if it ain’t broke, why fix it? As a time-sink, you could spend hundreds of hours building strategies for online multiplayer battles and not get bored.

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